Joan Standfast
1913 - 2009

Joan Standfast nèe Brice

A life Remembered

by - Edward Owen.

Joan was born on the 22nd May 1913 at Boones Road in Lee, Joan was the fourth and Last child born to Frederick and Alma Brice Her father was an electrician. Her Mother, who sadly died at the age of 42 when Joan was 13, was a cook for a family living rather splendidly in a large house in Blackheath (Read more at this link). Alma had taught her daughter many culinary skills that Joan developed during her life to become an extraordinarily good cook herself, The love and caring responsibility of her elder sisters, Nickie and Winnie and her older brother Frank, considerably helped Joan come to terms with the early loss of her mother.

When a young woman, Joan worked in a bookshop in Blackheath village. It was there she made friends with Lilian Standfast who introduced Joan to her brother, Harry, a wood sawyer. Joan married Harry Standfast in 1934 when she was 21 and he, 25. Pamela, their daughter and only child, was born in 1935 when they were renting rooms in Camberwell. The country was in deep recession and times were hard. As with today the Building Industry was suffering badly so Harry had to seek new employment. He became a bread roundsman; hand-pulling a delivery cart for ten hours each day, six days a week, for a wage that without Joan's enterprising cooking and management of simple foods, would not have sustained them. Even then a piece of bread with a bowl of soup made from hot water and an oxo cube, was occasionally the only meal of the day. Despite the harshness of the times, Joan and Harry were determined to progress their life managing to save enough money to move to Sidcup renting a small house in Ramillies Road. By them, the hard times of the recession were being overtaken by more daunting and much grimmer prospects, the outbreak of World War ll and Harry joined the Auxiliary Fire Service. Joan's spending economy and skill with food were again tested and not found wanting.

During the 1940 blitz and whilst Harry was away at nights fighting massive fires in London, it was left to Joan to comfort and reassure their five year old daughter as they spent night after night in the Anderson shelter dug into their small back garden. It must have been terrifying as they listened to the roar of the ack-ack guns, explosions and screaming of bombs hurtling to earth.

Almost unbelievably their desire to continue progressing their family life motivated Harry to use his carpentry skills, turning scraps of wood into children's toys. Joan tool these toys to various shops in Deptford and Lewisham for them to buy. Chiesmans became a big customer. The sale proceeds were carefully saved, so that in 1946 when World War ll came to an end, they were able to buy a bungalow in Sidcup. 51 Little Birches had a large area of neglected land at its rear which within a few years turned into a beautiful garden where they both spent many happy tending hundreds of flowers. Harry, now a maintenance man at Coates Bro's. Printing Inks, was a regular prizewinner in the firm's gardening competitions.

In 1957 Pam had married Ed and by 1974 when Harry retired from Coates Bro's, they were proud and loving grandparents to Nicola, Sally and Jonathan. Realising their dream of Living by the sea, Joan and Harry first moved to Hastings before buying a bungalow in Bexhill with a garden size matching the one they had at Little Birches. Here, Ed and Pam's family were frequent weekend visitors delighting in the sea air, another magnificent garden, and of course Joan's delicious lunches - her cooking skills as strong as ever.

So Joan and Harry's hardworking and orderly lives continued until 1986 when Harry suffered a stroke that robbed him of much of his memory. Joan's courage, her determined spirit, her love for Harry, were strong and permanent. Despite many difficulties and against professional advice Joan took personal care of Harry. For the next three years at their home, she worked to the point of exhaustion, tending his every need, keeping him immaculately clean right up to the 5th November 1989, the day he died.

-Reluctant to leave the home and garden that had meant so much to them, it took another four years before Joan, now 80, accepted that it was all becoming too much for her to look after. In 1994 Joan returned to Sidcup, purchasing a flat in Glenrose Court. By then she had been presented her first great grandchild, Marcus Owen now five months old. Even so she was finding it difficult settling in to her new residence and lifestyle. Her ground floor flat, which had double aspect views of the garden, was a blessing; as indeed were the friendly and sociable residents who nicknamed her "Lofty" on account of her height, 4' 11".

In the years that followed she proudly maintained her independence, and other then from Pam, refused any offer of home help and continued to wash, iron and of course, cook until she was taken into hospital. Despite the onset of discomforting medical conditions, blindness and deafness, she continued to embrace life particularly uplifted by the arrival of further great grandchildren at almost annual intervals. Rosie Bolam 1994 - Jack Higham 1995 - Melissa Owen 1996 - Harry Higham 1997 - Pippa Higham - 1999.

Joan Standfast lived all of her 95 years up to her name. She stood fast in her beliefs and ideals. She loved her daughter, her grandchildren and six great grandchildren. In hospital; after her heart attack, she determined to return to her flat in Glenrose Court. When plans were being made for the provision of home helps coinciding as they did with serious secondary infections, the life she knew, the life she loved and which she would still have fought on for, was at an end.

A few days before she died she mentioned her concern that "Jesus was a long time coming". In the event he did arrive a day or so later.

Joan Standfast at her daughter Pam's golden wedding celebration 2007

This history was written by Joan's son-in-law Edward Owen. It was read at Joan's service of thanksgiving, at Hither Green Crematorium on the 27th February 2009.

The photographs were kindly supplied by Pamela Owen, Joan's daughter.